Hannah's Elizabeth's Birth Story

          Sam and I were blessed to discover that we were pregnant with Hannah after seven years of trying to conceive.  We had originally planned to deliver her at a birth center near Philly, but after moving almost 5 hours away, we researched other options.  Finally, after much prayer and consideration, we decided on a homebirth with a certified professional midwife.  I desired to labor with minimal interference and both of us agreed with the philosophy and practice of our midwife over what the hospital believed and practiced. 

March 1st

          I believe that our bodies and emotions are interwove, so my story must start with the loss of my sister.  My sister Maria lost her battle with cancer March 1st.  I was almost 38 weeks pregnant and really wanted to attend her funeral, which was two hours away.  The funeral was scheduled for the 5th.

March 2nd

          My dear friend Becky came up to visit me and support me in my grief.  While we were out getting birth supplies and yummy foods (ice pops, strawberries, whipping cream, and 4 different types of vinegar-not a craving), I had several contractions, at least 1 every 2 hours.  They were painless, but felt like a tightening on my preggo tummy. 

          My in-laws also called during this time to ask if they could spend the night and caravan with them, the next day, up to my sister's funeral.  I did not want them to come, because we hadn't told them that we were having a homebirth.  (We hardly told anyone due to the strong reactions that people seemed to have to the idea.  I had to overcome my own fears and did not want to deal with other people's fear on top of that.)  Sam said they should come and that I wouldn’t go into labor, so of course I did!

March 3rd

          At 7 PM I started to feel really gross, my back ached and I just wanted to go to bed.  My mother-in-law said that if I started to have back pain Sam should take me to the hospital cause it was probably labor!  She had no idea that I was in labor or that I was planning on having a homebirth. 

          At Sam's instance I decided to stay up for our late diner, and things picked up by 8.  During the meal I started ticking off the contractions with a pen on my hand so that I could keep track.  I kept forgetting things about my body.  So as if battling "The Silence" (monsters on Dr. Who) I would make a hash mark, on my arm, for each contraction.  I had about 5 in the course of an hour and a 1/2.  I ate, timed contractions, got ready for bed, and then spent some time with my mother-in-law fixing, cleaning, and nesting my birthing den.  Sam's mom still didn't know! 

          I went to bed.  I used the loo, washed my hands and then had a slight leak (I was not yet ready to say that I was in labor, never having done it before and feeling a bit unsure of myself.  The feeling was similar to when I would be sick as a child, but unsure if I should stay home from school.  I needed to be told that since I was sick, I could stay home). I called Lisa quietly on the phone after diner/around that time and told her about the contractions and other stuff that Sam said is TMI for publishing on the internet. :+)  She said that labor typically starts soon (within a few days) after that.

          I just saw Lisa Gambini, my midwife, that day at 1-ish for a midwife appointment at my home.  (Yes, she makes house calls.  Kind of important if I'm going to deliver at home!)  She thought that I would go late, 41 weeks or so.  The baby had yet to drop, but was in a good position.  I guess baby and God had other plans!  (Kristi's stress relieving foot rubs from a few days ago and the days that I spent weeping for my sister probably moved labor along.) The day that I went into labor I told to Sam that I did not want to weep that day.  The counselor side of me was a little concerned, but I needed a physical break.  The break worked in helping me to feel more rested and relived my headache. 

         

March 4th

          After that Sam & I went to bed.  I couldn't sleep, cause the contractions were becoming much more regular.  Since the "rest" phase of labor didn't happen, I decided to move into the "distract" phrase.  Enter Pintress!  I "pinned" things for several hours, until Sam came out of the bed room at 1:30 ish.  He asked how things were, they were getting more intense and regular, so he said that I should call Lisa.  I didn't want to disturb her, cause it could have been a false alarm, but Sam insisted. 

          Lisa answered groggily, and said that she would be there at 5 AM on Sunday.  (I gave her an extra 1/2 hour, as things could run late.)  She got there at 5:45.  I called her back to tell her that our in-laws were here, and sleeping and requested that she enter through the basement. I also called to make sure she brought the tub, which was a bit micro-managing on my part, but I was in labor! 

          Becky was sleeping in the den, so we went down stairs and tried not to wake her up.  Once she saw me, she knew that I must be in labor for real and was too excited to go back to sleep.  We stayed up all night watching "Downtown Abby" and "Pysch" on really low volume in order not to wake my in-laws. 

          I quickly discovered that during contractions no one was allowed to talk or to touch me.  I had thought that I would like massage and verbal encouragement, so Sam was all prepared and ready to go.  I felt bad that he couldn't help me during the contractions, but I really needed to focus.  During each contraction I moved, mostly on the red exercise ball, and I prayed.  I also focused on relaxing my shoulder and face muscles, which helped me to be more comfortable and not fight with my body. My early prayers was the following "God is my strength, Lisa is my guide, Sam is my love, and Becky is my encourager/encouragement."  Later I would focus on God being my strength and him being in control.  I would state that the contractions are good and that God designed them to help my baby to come out. 

          During the final phases of labor I would remind myself that I only had to make it through that contraction once, and never have that same one again.  I also spent time praying for my family, as they were all headed to my sister's funeral. And I prayed that my mid-wife would get here safely.  I've heard of women turning inward during labor, but I never knew how intensely that would be true of for me.  Any noise would break my focus, and make the contraction harder to deal with.  I also closed my eyes every contraction to help with my focus. 

          As soon as Lisa arrived she started quietly and quickly setting up the birthing pool and her supplies.  We caught her up on my labor, and then she checked my blood pressure and the baby's heart rate.  All were good. 

          We labored on until around 8ish, when I heard my in-laws stirring.  I decided then that it was a good time for me to go on a walk, as I did not want to be around when my mother-in-law found out!  (She was worried about our baby's birth and had no idea about our home birth plans).  So my dear friend gained the task of telling them that I was in labor, though I thought that she could stall them until we returned, so that Sam could tell them where we were going to give birth.  (Or at least that’s what I tell myself so that I don’t feel too bad for giving Becky a crazy awkward task!) 

          Our walk was awesome.  There were birds singing and the sun was shining.  The emotions of the walk were good ones. There was a tenderness between us.  I held my husbands arm as we walked, one contraction out (we didn't want to be too far away).  I felt very close to my hubby.  As a contraction came I would pause, and rock/sway back and forth.  At one point in time I held onto Sam's arms and put my head on his back in order to rock and sway.  (I liked doing that, but nothing beats the birthing ball and the birth pool!)

          Sam took pictures of us down by the Pine Creek.  When we got back, Becky had told my in-laws, who remained upstairs till they were invited down.  My mid-wife pretty much hung out on the couch, observing me, and occasionally reminding me to relax my face or shoulders. 

          Once my mother-in-law got over her shock, she wanted to stay.  But I just needed Sam and Lisa as I had emotionally and mentally prepared for them. 

          Sam's mom was able to help with things though, which was wonderful.  Our water heater was turned all the way down, Lisa turned it up, but the water took a while to heat up.  So, my mother-in-law was able to boil water and fill the birth tub with it.  (Supper cliché to boil water while someone is in labor, but oh how nice the tub felt once I got in it!). She also made fried eggs and fed the crew with that.  I had a soft boiled egg (throughout labor I ate eggs, shortbread cookies, ice pops, Kozy Shack rice pudding, and veggie beef soup.  I also drank gater-aid, apple juice, and water even in between pushing.  I cannot imagine trying to do that much work without eating & fueling up!)

          Around this time church is starting across the street, and Sam asked if he can go tell everyone.  (He is the pastor).  Originally I wanted to keep my labor a secret so that I wouldn’t feel pressured, but we also were not planning on having house guests either!  So he told them and he was so excited the whole time!  My father in law headed over to the church (to get out of the house! He did not want to boil water.). 

          Sam convinced his mom and dad to continue up to the funeral as planned.  Before they left they came down to visit with me, and Sam's dad broke my rules by talking during a contraction, then whispering.  I and everyone else shushed him!  Poor dad!

          Once they left I got into the tube, which felt awesome!  While in the birth tub I had Sam read Grimes Fairytales to me.  His energy level was way higher then mine, which was getting on my nerves, so having him read to me gave him something to do and kept us entertained in between contractions.  Lisa noted that when it was just her and I my contractions were closer together.

          The contractions were doing what they were supposed to, I was effacing nicely and dilating slowly.  The first time she checked me I was at 4, then hours later 5, then hours later 6.  I think that once everyone left things sped up.  Lisa said that if I was at a hospital the staff would have been pushing pitocine on me, cause my contractions weren't that close together.  I did not need them to be close, because they were doing their job (something I reminded myself of while in labor).

          Before my in-laws left my mid-wife suggested that I take a shower, which felt so good!  I moved and swayed through the contractions in the shower.  I think that she suggested that so that I could relax, b/c the circumstances weren't relaxing for me!  After the shower she suggested that I try to nap.  I brought my ball to set in the corner of the bedroom and every time I had a contraction I had to get up and rock on it.  Otherwise it wasn't bearable.  Its not that the pain was so bad, its just that it made me restless and in order to work with it, I had to move.  (I highly recommend trying to rest during labor.  You need your energy.  Rest can happen without an epidural.)

          It was getting late on Saturday night and I really started to get frustrated that things were not picking up.  Lisa asked about it, the suggested that I lay on the floor face down, butt up in the air.  It totally made the contractions closer & strong, but I couldn't stay in that position once they hit.  (I also climbed stairs). I had to get to my ball in order to rock back and forth, did that for a while, then Sam & Lisa recommended that I try resting again.  She made me a little pile of blankets & cushions to sit on while leaning against Sam in the recliner ( I was on the floor).  It worked, b/ t contractions I was able to sleep for 5 to 8 minute stretches, Sam said it made the contractions more intense.  We were transitioning to the pushing phase at that point.  I increased my internal dialog to include the fact that I would never have to go through that particular contraction ever again.  That helped.

          Lisa placed the baby outfit I had for Hannah near me to see and provide focus for my labor.  I also used Sam's feet to help push me up ( my bottom) and to squeeze (his feet) during contractions.  Eventually the pressure was so much that I couldn't stay in that position any more.  Sam recommended trying the pool again, which I wanted, but didn't want anything to slow down my progress. Lisa said to try it & we'd know in 10 mins if it was slowing things down or not.

           I got in & it felt great! I was in the legs drawn together at the feet pose.  It worked for a bit.  I also laid my head in Sam's hands and he expertly massaged me. This increased my contractions making them way more frequent & stronger. Then the contractions got really uncomfortable!  The pressure was strong & I was afraid of having a BM in the pool (which thankfully didn't happen!).  I called Lisa over during this time.  Now was when I really wanted and needed her in a more active way.  She was so good at respecting my needs and reading my cues.  She provided encouragement in between pushes and provided me with a sense of safety. 

          Being in a seated position was getting really uncomfortable and I felt myself fighting the feelings at in that position.  By that I mean that I was unable to work with my body in a seated position, so I decided to switch positions, to hand & knees.  I'd lay my face on the edge of the pool or in Sam's hands between contractions. Lisa instructed me to make low moaning noises, as apposed to high pitch ones, as that can help you stay realized.  And honestly I almost fell asleep a few times in between pushes! 

          Before I started pushing I threw up for the second time.  It honestly did not bother me, cause I kept thinking how much Lisa would like the fact that I was throwing up, it helps things to progress.  I told her what I was thinking afterward and she was so encouraging, as always.  Right before I needed to push, Lisa had me get out of the tub to use the loo one more time.  And at some point during the pushing Sam said a cheer "Push her out, push her out, wayyyy out!"  I couldn’t believe him!  He was too cute and having way too much fun!  He also said some really sweet and encouraging tender words to me.  I love my man!

March 5th
            At midnight Lisa looked at her watch and wished Sam a happy birthday.  Sam began to tear up because this meant Hannah was going to be born on his birthday.  He is certain that this will be the best birthday present ever given.  He is also well aware that every birthday party from here out will somehow be princes or mermaid themed!

          Sam had to start translating to Lisa what I was saying because I was hard to understand. I would quietly asked things like, "the baby's heart rate okay", etc.  I had also called for her to come over at this point, c/ I wanted her encouragement while pushing.  (My waters didn't break until I was pushing and I was in water, so I did not feel anything).  She told me to reach down & tell her what I saw.  I said that I felt the amniotic sac or her head.  It was soft , squishy and velvety.  It also hurt to touch any part of me, but not the baby.  I kept checking her progress as I pushed.  It was very encouraging to me. The baby was coming and I was impacting that through my pushes. 

          I started to vocalize my internal dialogue during this time.  I encouraged myself by saying things like "she's coming, its good, its good, its good, I'll get it in the next push".  As I was pushing I'd shake my head yes to yes I can do this. I'd also shake it no, Lisa thought that was me thinking that I couldn't do it and she kept telling me that I could.  That wasn't it.  There were thoughts that were not welcome and I had to kick them out of my mind. I did also moan and the closer I got to pushing her out, the fiercer my battle cries got.  I was in pain, but I was not suffering.  There is a huge difference between the two.  I knew that I needed to press through the pain.  I learned that through my counseling program, you must pass through the pain to gain the growth and reward. 

          My first pushes were tentative and not very strong.  I was testing this whole thing out and while pushing was relieving, it was still painful. The contractions seemed to change during the pushing phase from a steady cresting strength, to several waves of energy per contraction.  I got to push several times during each of the wave, feeling the baby moving down.  Incredible! 

          Lisa monitored Hannah during the contractions.  Hannah did great.  Her heart rate was strong the whole time.  Lisa also held me in order to prevent bad tears.  When she did that I said "I don't like that" in a child like sounding voice.  I did not fight or resist her, cause I knew it was to help me, but man did that feel uncomfortable and irritating!   Eventually she did not do it anymore, I think that was when I stretched out enough.

          Hannah felt like she had three parts, "knobs".  I kept pushing and getting past each part until I finally felt a massive contraction and gave a fierce cry and a long series of pushes.  Then she was out!  Lisa told me to reach down and pick up my baby.  I scooped her up and I cannot describe that completely, it was amazing.

          Lisa wrapped towels around her and I, and then put the cap on her head to keep her warm (we were still in the pool).  I told my baby to cry for me and she gave three wonderful, strong, lusty cries and then stared up at us.  (Lisa took photos for us, which we cherish).  Sam came around behind me and put his arms around me and our little one.  We kept saying how beautiful she was over and over again.  Then all of a sudden, as if a light blub went off, we reached down and lifted her leg to check her gender!  We hadn't done that yet!  And our baby was indeed a girl!

          After several minutes, and the cord was done pulsing, Lisa asked Sam if he wanted to cut it.  Before her birth, he had said no, but I asked Lisa to offer him the option again.  She did and Sam did cut the cord.  Then he held her as I stepped out of the pool and delivered the placenta.  Lisa told me to cough a few times, and it came out!  At that moment I felt so shaky and I was shivering violently.  I am sure that it was due to the birth, changes in hormones, and the cold of leaving a warm tub.  I got right under the covers of my couch bed and felt mush better. 

          Lisa check me out and I had two 1st degree tears, and some skid marks, none of which required stitches.  My bleeding was normal, so Sam made Lisa some coffee for the ride home.  Lisa checked Hannah's reflexes and health and measured her.  She weighed in at 7 pounds 9 ounces, 13 inch head, and was 19 1/2 inches long.   And she was very healthy with great color!

          I am so thankful for Lisa who was our lifeguard for the birth process.  (You don’t swim without one, but if no one is drowning, you don't send the life guard into the pool to save them!  You let them swim.)  She was great.  She was calm and reassuring.  I am thankful for my awesome husband who not only did great, but also enjoyed the whole process and made me feel beautiful during birth.  I am thankful for all of the help that Becky was both during labor and before.  Her presence was wonderful. I am thankful that my mother-in-law was able to participate in her way and feed the crew. But, most importantly, I am thankful for God for giving me this child and experience.  It was an amazing thing to participate in bringing a new life into being.  We are already praying that God will blesses us with more!